A silent conversation is continuously ongoing in our minds. Like a faucet left just barely on, we may not even notice it. It’s always happening. Whether checking cows early in the morning or relaxing in the recliner at the end of the day, your mind is filling in the rest of this statement: “I am …”
Without mental training and exercise, it’s easy for our minds to fill in the blanks with negativity and pessimism.
“I am tired.”
“I am discouraged.”
“I am not getting enough done.”
How we take control of this conversation with ourselves makes all the difference long-term in the outcomes we achieve – personally and professionally.
I challenge you to start turning this self-talk into one of your strongest assets. To do so requires three steps.
First, catch yourself in conversation. Stop reading this page for a moment. Think back to earlier today. What were you telling yourself when you were alone? Maybe it was early in the morning before anyone else in the house was up. Maybe it was while in the shower. (That’s when my self-talk is most active.) Maybe it was when you were in the pickup truck by yourself. You must recognize what you told yourself to begin to make any change in how you talk to yourself. The easier you can recall how you filled in your “I am …” statement, the more self-aware you are becoming about how your thoughts guide your actions. If you can’t remember what you told yourself today, start tomorrow. Usually, we fill in our “I am …” statement early in the day and live it for the next 24 hours. I encourage you to watch tomorrow to see how you fill in the blank.
Second, change the narrative. If you don’t like how you filled in your “I am …” statement, improvement is as simple as upgrading the words we tell ourselves. If you really are tired, can you tell yourself to take a short nap and then get back at it? Or are you just telling yourself you’re tired because you don’t really want to face what’s next? Maybe you really have given it everything you’ve got and are exhausted. In such cases, even just changing an “I am …” statement from “I am tired” to “I am recharging” can make a huge difference.
Finally, reinforce the narrative. Once you know what you want to tell yourself, repeat your “I am …” statement regularly throughout the day until it sticks. Your mind will want to say it’s tired rather than recharging the first few times you think of being worn down. But after just a few times of telling yourself something different, I promise you’ll start to see your situation differently, and maybe even feel different about it.
I hope you bounce back today with a solid “I am …” statement. Use one of these if you need to:
“I am recharging.”
“I am recalibrating.”
“I am ready for the next challenge.”
