As tasks, bills and everything else piles up on the farm, prioritization is important. As you set those priorities, where do you fall on that list? Are your care and well-being even considered as priorities? In farming and in our culture in general, we value long work hours and putting our bodies through extremes to get the job done. There is something to be admired in that, but it also takes a toll. I hear far too often of farmers feeling guilty about taking vacations or even getting off the farm for a couple of days to go to a trade show or conference. Taking care of ourselves isn’t selfish. The well-being of the farm depends on the well-being of the farmer.
When thinking about well-being, I like to harken back to an earlier time in dairy farming and picture a three-legged milking stool. A stool has two major components: the seat and the legs. Think of the seat as you: your responsibilities, your health, your job, your family, etc. The seat is supported by the legs. In this example, the legs represent three areas of health or well-being: physical, mental and emotional.
Your physical health is the general well-being of your body: sleeping seven to nine hours each night, eating balanced meals and snacks and being active. Mental health and emotional health can be a little tricky to tell apart but think of them like a tag team. Mental health refers to your ability to process information. Emotional health refers to your ability to express feelings, which are based on the information you have processed. We need to attend to all three legs equally to ensure we are properly supported. If you neglect one area, imagine cutting an inch off one of the legs. You’ll still be upright, but it will be uncomfortable and more difficult to support yourself.
Taking care of yourself is so critical because it allows you to then take care of others. I think it is in the nature of every farmer to want to rush to help someone in need and to make sure everyone is comfortable and cared for before caring for themselves. You have likely heard me or someone else say, “Adjust your own oxygen mask first.” When you fly, this is always a key part of the safety message shared during preflight. You cannot give 100% of yourself to others if you are not at 100% to begin with. You cannot pour from an empty cup. So, what are you doing to fill your cup? What recharges you to 100%?
Think back to the three-legged stool. It is important that we are using a combination of strategies to promote physical, mental and emotional health. Some strategies I like to use and encourage others to try are deep breathing, meditation or reflection, positive self-talk, physical activity, hobbies, connecting with people in your social network and speaking with a mental health professional.
Deep breathing is a great way to reset your brain and regroup your thoughts. It is quick, free and easy. In deep breathing, the only thing you need to focus on is the air going in and out of your lungs. My favorite deep breathing exercise is box breathing: inhale for 4 seconds, hold your breath for 4 seconds, exhale for 4 seconds and rest for 4 seconds. Repeat this cycle a few times and see how refreshed you feel.
Meditation and reflection are similar practices that focus on clearing your mind of competing thoughts and focusing your attention on one major thing. Meditation is a great way to clear your mind and examine your thoughts from an outside perspective. There are several meditation apps and YouTube videos out there. It can feel a little weird at first, but it can really have an impact on how you feel mentally and emotionally. Reflection is similar, as it is about observing your thoughts in a specific way. Some great ways to reflect include journaling, writing down three things you are grateful for every day, or savoring a moment of awe, serenity or joy.
A positive mindset has been proven to improve people’s moods and how they feel about themselves. Positive self-talk focuses on the way you view yourself and your day. A great exercise is to replace all the times you think about what you “have to” do with what you “get to” do. “I have to pick up the kids after school,” becomes, “I get to pick up the kids after school.” As you think about yourself and your abilities, it can be easy to get negative and think the worst of yourself – thinking “I’m lazy,” or, “I’m not good at my job.” If you wouldn’t say those things to your closest friend or family member, you shouldn’t be saying them to yourself.
Physical activity plays a crucial role in supporting all three areas of our well-being. Whether it is exercising at the gym, going for a run, taking the dog for a walk, or playing with the kids outside, doing some physical activity each day will help promote a healthy body and a healthy mind. Similarly, hobbies can support our physical, mental and emotional health. Sports, cooking, reading, hunting, and fishing are all great ways to enjoy something you are passionate about and take care of yourself.
One of the easiest and best ways to support emotional health is through connecting with your social network. When we are under a lot of stress or in a mental health crisis, we tend to isolate ourselves from others. Being social and talking to people we trust is imperative to emotional and mental well-being. Sometimes, we may find it is beneficial to talk to someone who doesn’t know our entire life. Mental health professionals are not just for people in a mental health crisis or with a mental illness. They are for everyone.
It can be far too easy to put ourselves low on the priority list. Self-care isn’t selfish; taking care of your physical, mental and emotional health ensures you are at your best for your farm, family and friends.
